experience, strength and hope in recovery

Freedom Today

My name is Nikki, and I am an addict. This week has been full with the gifts of recovery. After 8 years of not having my license I got my license back, and my car registered and insured. I am now a legal driver. After years of holding onto resentments against the courts, because of losing my license, and spending every penny on the next one. Being clean and sober in recovery has given me freedom today not only from active addiction, but freedom today to own my part in order to make my amends to society. In the 16 months of being clean and sober I have grown as a person, and accomplished goals I never even imagined were possible.

Setting Goals

If you would of told me a year ago I was going to get my license back, I would’ve told you it was impossible. I had fines of $4000 holding me back, and I didn’t think it was possible. In putting my recovery first anything is possible. When I worked on my 8th and 9th step my sponsor and I set some goals.

Obtaining Goals

We made a budget plan, and I started putting in the footwork. Asking God for his guidance along the way. In 3 months I worked hard, prayed hard, disciplined my spending, paid off all my tickets, set up a payment plan for outstanding court costs, and I bought a car! Like my own car in 8 years! I was able to pay the reinstatement fees, and got it insured and registered. I didn’t do it alone.

Blessings

God, my sponsor and working my program showed me how. My family did chip in some to help me. Today they see the changes in me, and as a result they are actually willing to help me. They want what is best for me. I can not express how good it feels to be driving again! Driving again Legally! For years I always had to look over my shoulder driving. Today I am not concerned with that. Today I try to do the next right thing everyday.

Being of Service

Life will keep getting better with every day I have clean, and for this I have so much gratitude. Now I can be of service to other addicts, bring them to meetings just as others did for me. If it wasn’t for the people who drove me, to and from meetings and service commitments, I would not be where I am today. They are all a part of my journey.

Trust Your Struggle

I am grateful for all the people in my life today. Everyone that has been a part of my journey has helped me in one way or another. In my journey there have been lessons. Some of these people have hurt me, and through that pain came strength. And, some people have been blessings. The good, and the bad have been growing experiences. I am grateful for all of those people. Trust your struggle because the best has yet to come!

A grateful recovering addict, Nikki

Spiritual Awakening

After coming back from a relapse November 1, 2017, I had a spiritual awakening while in a home group meeting. We were reading Step 1 and I realized, like it was a total Epiphany that I never worked my first Step honestly and openly with myself or a sponsor!! I was introduced to AA back in 2006, and have previously worked the steps in “AA” and had some time in previous years, but I always relapsed eventually. I realize now, after being introduced to “NA” this time and working my first step in the “NA “Step Working Guide with my sponsor that I, for the first time in recover, finally worked an honest and thorough first step!! It just took me eleven years to recognize.

Working My First Step

The program and my support group have always told me to “Thine own-self be true”. I never understood the full meaning until working my first step in “NA”. Honesty, the first principle is of utmost importance in my recovery and I always believed it was about being honest with others. I never realized the only person when I was using and tied into all my web of lies, that I was not being truly honest with myself and my Higher Power! I had never previously worked a truly honest program.

Honesty

Today, it is so freeing to be able to recognize and be honest with myself, my Higher Power, and others! I am able to look in the mirror today and like who I see. I was never able to do that before, I always hated myself. Today I have begun the journey of loving myself and am so grateful for this gift of recovery!!

Stacy

Unity Day

My name is Lauren and I am an addict. My clean date is April 29th 2017. Tomorrow will be my 9 months clean. Yesterday January 27th I got to go and experience my first Unity Day brought together by Recovery Coast. Last year I had missed it because I was working all day. This year I took it off weeks in advance. I got to have my kid all weekend and he got to come with me. Unity brings us together. I can’t even begin to explain in words the type of Serenity this event brought to me.

Together We Can

The unity that Narcotics Anonymous has has been what I feel like I’ve been searching for my whole life. The things we can do as a team, as a family, as a whole are beautiful and without a doubt empowering. There were games such as Fear Factor, Hungry Hippos, and relay races. Then there were workshops and meetings with some amazing speakers that came to share their Experience, Strength, and Hope. And, it was all for a good cause to raise money for our area. At the end of the day I couldn’t be more grateful for the family that I have found in Narcotics Anonymous. It makes it even better that my brother is in this journey with me, and experiencing this new way of life. Alone never again. Together we can in unity.

Serene and blessed recovering addict, Lauren

I Am An Addict

My name is Becky and I am an addict. I say this because I need a daily reminder that I am not okay, not in control of my life (at the moment anyway). My addiction has been a 10 year battle and everyday is a struggle. It took me a long time to accept the fact that I am an addict. My addiction is something I now have to accept every day, all day, and in the beginning I hated it! However, I am slowly learning, and I say slowly because I have messed up so many times. I could not and would not accept the fact that I was an addict and powerless, my life forever unmanageable, because who wants to really? But when you have lost everything, have nowhere to go, hate yourself and if you want to survive one has to turn their will and life over. Being an addict is not the end of the world. I can survive with this disease and be happy clean working my recovery.

Working Step Three

I put off writing this blog because in my head it had to be this elaborate piece that would change the world. It had to be perfect. Well that is not going to happen, so I am just going to write whatever is in my head at the time. Scary! I look forward to sharing my story as I continue working step three, and it is kicking my ass. So much so that I am going back to the first step to discover what I missed and led to my relapse! Stay tuned! 🙂

~Becky

New Year in Recovery

I am writing my January blog for the New Year in recovery. It began great with all the girls here at Da Vinci and Angie. We all have a wonderful spirit of recovery and a sisterhood that’s I’m truly grateful for. I’m going on a year living here and I can’t think of a better place to live or a better house mom to have.

Recovery Blessings

I’ve been fortunate enough to get a job in the house taking 2 of the girls to and from work which provides me with a little more income. I’ve worked hard on my self and my recovery, and as a result I got my 1 year NA key tag on November 30th. And on January 9th I graduate drug court! Which will be a giant accomplishment. All in all staying here at Da Vinci with the support and my supporting them too. I truly couldn’t have done it without Angie’s help and her house; she’s a savior in many respects. I go to church at Calvary as often as I can and pray to my Higher Power JC everyday and let him guide my every move and decision.

Take care to all, Linda